Self Love Is Never What We Think It Is
How many times have we reached a new point in our lives and asked ourselves what we “should” be doing? It’s ridiculous. As a perceived shift in our reality comes from a new calendar year, we convince ourselves that we need to be doing all of these things that we’re not. It’s demeaning.
It hurts our souls when we constantly decide we aren’t measuring up to some standard that so many others are following. We see the Facebook posts from others that tout how they are “reinventing” themselves this year. Or they’ve selected this new word for the year that will dictate exactly what they desire.
It hurts our souls when we constantly decide we aren’t measuring up to some standard that so many others are following.
So we start to believe that in order to reach our best level of happiness, we have to “take care” of ourselves in ways that create huge change. We have to find a way to change our level of self love because that’s the only way that is good. It’s not right.
Am I discrediting all the good that positive change brings? Of course not. What I am saying is that you don’t have to change one single molecule in your body in order to love yourself. Seeking something else in order to fill the inner void never works. You can try and try and try for decades, a lifetime even. And it never works.
Your Path To Self Love
Your path to loving yourself, discovering who you truly are, filling up your internal cup to a sparkling brim … cannot be put into a single goal. It cannot be measured in a year’s worth of effort. It cannot take place in just reading this single article.
So, now that you’re all depressed, hoping that this piece would be yet another something to fill you up, wondering why you’re still reading … there is good news. We have to dip into the somber reality that we truly don’t know as much as we’d like almost all of the time. And that means we get to live in more anticipation and excitement for the unknown than ever before.
We get to live in more anticipation and excitement for the unknown than ever before.
Your own level of self care that leads to your unique description of self love can only be discovered by YOU. And this discovery process takes places constantly. We have to be okay with that. We have to choose to be okay with that.
The Idea of Certainty
We often hear too much that we need to be certain in who we are, certain in what we’re doing, certain in how to become what we want to be, certain that all our desires are being fulfilled in the ether as we speak. I say forget certainty.
Become excited about UNcertainty. Become eager to experience the unknown. If your self care is different every day, wonderful! If your self love dips and wains on a regular basis, fantastic! You’re a freakin’ human being.
Become eager to experience the unknown.
You can plan and prepare and visualize and generate the feelings you desire. You can act on a routine, change beliefs, and install habits that serve you. All of this is wonderful, so I’m not bashing it.
Then you still get to experience life from an unknown perspective. You still get to go through challenges that will forever come up to strengthen you. You still get to choose how to live your life day in and day out.
The Truth About Your Self Love
I’m not going to give you a self care routine today. I’m not going to outline the exact steps you absolutely have to go through in order to find a level of self love that serves you. I am going to confront you with the idea that you have to be okay no matter what happens.
Once you accept this truth, you can do whatever you wish that will build you. When our children have worries and stresses on their minds, we constantly reassure them that things will be okay. And they always are. Life can blow up and grow up and it’s still all okay.
Life can blow up and grow up and it’s still all okay.
So why don’t we accept this ourselves? When you choose to be okay with whatever comes, whatever you feel, whatever you experience, no matter if you intentionally created it or not … then everything you do will lift you.
Everything you do will reinforce love on some level, in some way. Everything about your life will reinforce goodness. Everything you seek to fill up inside of you will do so. So choose.
Choose to accept everything, honor what you feel, and love will find a way.
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